Human history is filled with the search for room to live, room to learn, and room to love.

In Christian lore the most poigant search is the search of Mary and Joseph to find a place to bring their baby and our baby into the world. That they found finally only a cattle barn makes all human beings who hear the story one with the little baby born in the manger.

We are at our best, we huamn beings, when we endeavor to make room for someone else to live in peace and in joy.

Habitat for Humanity is about the business and the beauty of finding and making room for those who have no space. I am pround of all those who participate in that anceint and new endeavor.

• Maya Angelou

Thanks to Granpa for giving me the card with this text and for providing a place as mentioned within, to me and many others like me.

2002:12:12 Atlanta

I began to speak and spoke not, and the words stuck in my throat flare now like a poem, this one I write.

I open and close the book again and again. I don't find a few thousand mouths in me, like the thousand mouths of a river in a far away country, I need to write this song I began to and forgot, helpless

I am, unable to find the words to pluck as fruit from a tree or words like unsteady planets wobbling in their orbits or words that simply fall as snow falls softly in a dark night, soundlessly.

My words are hard: as a rock, as me, or the lines that etch my face, useless words. I need words as fluid as flags waving in the wind, as fluid as a laugh,

a silver fish travelling up the river of my blood, of a woman dressed in dreams, that beat their wings around her as they take off like birds into the evening sky, across the blankness of unfilled sheets.

Will you bring me, few such words?

2002:12:12 01:00 Atlanta For S.B.

time is never time at all you can never ever leave without leaving a piece of youth and our lives are forever changed we will never be the same the more you change the less you feel believe, believe in me, believe that life can change, that you're not stuck in vain we're not the same, we're different tonight tonight, so bright tonight and you know you're never sure but you're sure you could be right if you held yourself up to the light and the embers never fade in your city by the lake the place where you were born believe, believe in me, believe in the resolute urgency of now and if you believe there's not a chance tonight tonight, so bright tonight we'll crucify the insincere tonight we'll make things right, we'll feel it all tonight we'll find a way to offer up the night tonight the indescribable moments of your life tonight the impossible is possible tonight believe in me as i believe in you, tonight

For MOM(kiran).

Since I can't in any other way, communicate the pain I feel everytime I think about him in the last 48 hours and how things have transpired in his life. He writes he wishes that he will get another life to live out the love that is now engaged to another person. I have nothing to say to that except that he deserves much better then the pathetic shit he has been dragged through. And that even if he gets another life I would pray that he would not get involved with a person who can't live the convictions she claims to have. I think this is much worse.

Atleast it's bearable if people come out and just say that they don't love us anymore, as it happened in one of the iterations I have been through. But this hipocrisy of claiming love and then shying away from it is the most fucked up place to be. Maybe I write this because I feel this inability to defend myself while someone is punching me in the face as they claim a lot of love at the same time. Is it love or just plain hedging against uncertainity: that scenario where one fucks around and not finding satisfaction can come back to the old "bitch" on hold? Whatever.

It doesn't matter when I burn like a comet here, in high fever as does MOM on another continent. And guitars tear through me, like bullets. Maybe this is what it means to be crucified and they who wound with one hand can't be of much help with the other.