Tin Wedding Whistle - Ogden Nash
Though you know it anyhow Listen to me, darling, now,
Proving what I need not prove How I know I love you, love.
Near and far, near and far, I am happy where you are;
Likewise I have never larnt How to be it where you aren't.
Far and wide, far and wide, I can walk with you beside;
Furthermore, I tell you what, I sit and sulk where you are not.
Visitors remark my frown Where you're upstairs and I am down,
Yes, and I'm afraid I pout When I'm indoors and you are out;
But how contentedly I view Any room containing you.
In fact I care not where you be, Just as long as it's with me.
In all your absences I glimpse Fire and flood and trolls and imps.
Is your train a minute slothful? I goad the stationmaster wrothful.
When with friends to bridge you drive I never know if you're alive,
And when you linger late in shops I long to telephone the cops.
Yet how worth the waiting for, To see you coming through the door.
Somehow, I can be complacent Never but with you adjacent.
Near and far, near and far, I am happy where you are;
Likewise I have never larnt How to be it where you aren't.
Then grudge me not my fond endeavor, To hold you in my sight forever;
Let none, not even you, disparage Such a valid reason for a marriage
... comment