Dear Good Man,

While I don't know the context behind this email, I think you are definitely being hard on yourself. Call me a cynic if you will but it has been my observation - both first and second hand - that most women don't like "good" men like yourself. We can call it the drama syndrome: how much fun or drama can to be had in discussing Plato or Dostoevsky or co-joining with you in going to a play or a concert when the tantalizing options of being swept off their feet/ being seduced/ being overwhelmed/ being well, well lubricated, are ever present, and are ever important on the scale of what they, i.e., most women desire? This in some cases is taken to the extreme of putting up with men who are given to the emotional and physical abuse, not to mention the whole song and dance - or should we call it science - on how men have to act like jerks (Google the terms "PUA" and "negging" sometime for enlightenment) to hold the interest of most women.

Should this lead to you throwing in the towel or even worse lead to despair? I think not for I am sure God (or the Devil) has given at least some of the females of the species the bright bulbs on the top of their heads to spot a good man, i.e., you. Also since this has devolved into an exposition, with your permission, I will make it into a blog post.

Best of luck on your fiction writing - that is something that will, perhaps, endure time.

Best. Sleepy Relationship Theorist

PS: I also realize that the converse of the above theory, i.e., most women don't like "good" men might be true, given the high degree general female angst on this subject. Which of course leads us all to Woody Allen's quip: "masturbation is sex with someone I love".